Une Belle Femme

Think about the most beautiful woman you know.

Think about une belle femme.

Not beautiful as in Jennifer Aniston, or Julia Roberts, who both possess outward beauty.

Think of someone you know in real life who is a very picture of beauty and grace.
A woman who everyone loves to be around because she exudes femininity and glows with warmth and comfort.

You may be wondering what her secret is. And no matter who it is you are thinking of, I can tell you what her secret is.

Are you ready for this?

The secret of a beautiful woman is that she affirms male headship in her life.

Wait, what? Did I really just say that? Yes, I did. In fact, it is so important, that not only is it in bold, underlined, larger and in a different color, I am going to say it again.

The secret of a beautiful woman is that she affirms male headship in her life.

Yes, I really did, and yes, I really mean it. Now all you feminists out there can go pound on your bed and scream in your pillow because "female oppression" still exists.


I) A beautiful woman submits to and affirms the male headship of God.

Without this first thing, a woman is not beautiful. I don't care if she is a Kardashian sister or Sports Illustrated's latest swimsuit model. A beautiful woman knows that God is in control and she is not. She submits her heart and life to him. She loves him. She cherishes his words to her. She knows and affirms that yes, God is male, and yes, he has authority over her life. She relishes in his love and in his sovereignty and care over her.


II) A beautiful woman affirms the male headship of her father. 

A beautiful woman acknowledges that her father is the head of the family, and submits to him as long as she is living in his household. She encourages him to lead (sometimes as only daughters can) and allows him to care for her in a way that blesses both of them. After she is married, she honors and respects him as her father even as she is no longer under his authority.


III) A beautiful woman affirms the male headship of her husband. 

A beautiful woman seeks to let her man lead her in every way - spiritually, financially, emotionally (to name a few). She is not bossy or pushy or loud or rude. She does not emotionally manipulate. She is open, honest and transparent. She does not harbor feelings of resentment towards him, storing up bad things in the past to launch at him when he messes up (which he will). She does not dangle sex over his head as a bribe or reward for good behavior, or withhold sex as a punishment for (what she deems) bad behavior. She does not use her emotions in a false way, and evaluates her words for encouragement and building up her man. Single ladies are beautiful women by seeking to affirm the male headship of their future husbands by cultivating the inclination to submit to her man when he comes along or by submitting to other men in positions of authority over her such as her father, her boss, and/or her pastor.


IV) A beautiful woman affirms the male headship of her brother and/or son. 

A beautiful woman does not submit to her brother or her son in the same way that she does submit to her husband, but she should still be affirming their masculinity in a right way. A beautiful woman encourages her brothers and her sons (and her spiritual brothers as well) to lead in a right way. She is able to help them practice for when they have wives of their own. She should be seeking to serve them where she is able. She complements their masculinity as she is in a unique position to be cherished and loved for who she is without having to submit to their role in her life. She should guide all men who come into contact with her into a way of masculinity as she supports and embraces her own role of femininity.


V) A beautiful woman affirms the male headship of her pastor and elders. 

A beautiful woman recognizes the authority of her pastor over her spiritually and submits to his leadership of the church. She seeks to use her womanly qualities and abilities to serve in the church where needed and where appropriate, and has an open line of communication with the pastor. She does not complain behind his back or whine about the length of the sermons, but affirms his preaching and teaching to everyone everywhere. She invites people to her church. She does not need to agree with him on everything, but should submit to his role of authority over her life.


We women bear the image of God in the same way that men do, but in a different way. Our encouragement of masculinity will differ in regards to our relationships with the men in our lives, but let us affirm men in their roles as men no matter if they are one or one hundred.